Sitting here in limbo...

Some of my posts are about writing.
Some are about personal things.
Some are about work.

Lately I've sort felt as if I am in limbo, between here and there, in all these subjects.

(Some of my posts are about places too, but there is no limbo about that. I'm in Egypt.
Egypt, herself, may be in limbo, but I'm simply an observer.)

* * *

On writing: 

Well my 10 contest adventure is coming to a close. I have now entered 10 contests online... Actually 11: I submitted an extra one because a previous entry seemed to be to a defunct organization. So, on the countdown, I will cut out the defunct submission and now say 10.... Results so far: 1 win, 8 losses and awaiting 1 result.

The limbo: Am I encouraged? Am I discouraged? In the scheme of things, am I a loser or a winner? Hell if I know. 

* * *

On Personal Things:

Limbo at it's finest. Somewhere between being a daughter and being a mother.

Building a cabin with my mom and sister.
Building a baby with my husband.

Both make the earth shake in strange ways that I like.

* * *
On work:

As a workaholic, the past months of not working have been a little hard for me. I admit it. I miss working. I miss toilets. I miss staff. I miss being on the phone for 18 hours straight. I miss logical frameworks. I miss bullshit meetings.

I read a lot about work (about aid work). I read technical documents that I never had the time to read. I read aid blogs. I read criticism of aid work. And there is a lot of criticism out there. Sometimes it tires me. Sometimes it excites me. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I think it's crap-dribble from ignorant people... (and not only when I disagree).

But why's that put me in limbo?
Because I know I am lucky as hell to be able to take this time off to be pregnant and to be a mom for the first time, but I still miss it.

* * *

I have a choice: either be okay with the limbo or do something. I don't much like conclusions, but as long as they are vague enough, maybe they can be useful. So since I've been reading a lot about work, since I don't know where to go with my writing adventure and since my mom is coming to visit me for a while and will probably motivate me...
I should just try to write more about work here.
We will see. I don't want to end up a crap-dribbling idiot.

You win some...

I haven't won any of the 10 public writing contests yet.
Feeling like a loser.
But life goes on. . .

And Ha!
The results for Contest Number 8 are in and I got an Honorable Mention!
Okay, so I didn't get the 1st prize for 100$, but I am counting this as a win in my adventure. (As always, I make the rules.)

The Foundling Review is a bonified, professional online literary magazine, and as honorable mention the piece is published there.  The contest was judged by professional editors and a guest author. So, to me, an honorable mention is a win: it is some recognition by strangers, by professional writers and editors that what I wrote is somehow worth reading.

* * *

The piece itself, as you remember from Eight is Infinity, is a 50 word short story entered in the "Pachas 50-word Fiction Contest". My entry is called "Painting" and started a while ago as a poem that I wrote for my wonderful friend Adrianne for her wedding day, she will recognize it. You can read my 50 word short story here on The Foundling Review website - and also read the winning entry and the 2 other honorable mentions because they are all very cool.

* * *

For the last two contests, I decided I would submit poetry to online journals to see if anything would be accepted for publication. This decision came about because in undertaking this adventure I have found that I, personally, hope more for publication in a journal than winning a contest. So a very personal feeling which maybe tells you about how my goals have changed.

Also, it has been more than a year that I have been on this adventure, and while I will continue to write and submit stuff to contests and other things online, I sort of want to wrap up this 10 writing contest thing. 

* * *

Contest #9 will be a poetry submission to The Foundling Review. (I chose this because of the last contest... seems if those editors liked the 50 word story, maybe I have a better chance?)

Contest #10 will be a poetry submission to Le Petit Zine. (I chose this one because I really like the style of most of the pieces they publish - vivid and interesting. The authors all seem to have a grasp of where to end lines, which is something that is hard for me so I probably have no chance.)

Each submission will consist of a few poems, as per each magazine's guidelines.

* * *

P.S. Today is my birthday. Puts me in limbo? More on that later.

Eight looks like infinity

Writing Contest Update!

Check out post "Seattle Seven" for a complete summary and links to all past contests. I'm not doing so good, but still having fun.

So, contest number 8 has been entered! Results should be known by mid-July, as per the contest announcement.

It is sponsored by the Foundling Review literary magazine, and is called the "Pacaas Contest." From the website:

"Foundling Review's 50-word Fiction contest
Pa.chaas [pah-chaas] - noun Hindi fifty.
50 words. No more, no less."

As usual, I can't put the piece up until after the results are announced, so you'll have to wait until mid-July for that.

* * *

In the mean time, I like the idea of 50-word fiction. In entering this contest I wrote another piece, which was a bit too cliche, so I will share that here, just to keep you entertained. I don't know what is special about 50-word pieces, but I like it.

I think creative writing should be about using as few words as possible. If the word isn't needed get it out of there.  If you get rid of a word and lose meaning, then search for better words. I guess that's why word restrictions are cool to me.

There is an interesting man who I "know" professionally, if only briefly by email. None the less, I have some respect for the dude. He seems to be smart, with critical, yet proactive and practical ideas about the work we do (or try to do) in coordination. I regret not getting to meet him in Haiti. His relevance to this post is that, as well as being a cluster guru, he is a rad poet of 50-word poem essays. I like them and I like to see this personal, creative side of someone whose name I see a lot professionally.

* * *

Son

Archetypal pterodactyl egg transmogrified into lizard, into monkey, into man. I make you rumble, jerk and pee, scraping your insides with virilocal nails and lenient bones. I breathe your blood in and out and in, while you cry, sucking solid air. We will meet and you will love me.

The Seattle Seven

Writing contest update time!

For anyone new, last April or so I embarked on this adventure to enter 10 online writing contests. So far I have entered 6, and well it was Friday, but today I will report on number 7.

So far, 7 contests entered, 0 won, but still waiting for results in 1.

* * * 

Past Contests Summary: I'm a loser baby.

Contest #1 was sponsored on Helium and I did horribly. I should have done well, because it was a subject I know and love (water and sanitation), but I sucked. That's cool. I kept submitting things on Helium, and on subjects where I felt less passionately (like make up tips), I did quite well. The poetry is still doing crappily, but I have made about 20 bucks over the past 10 months.

Contest #2 was an annual poetry contest to raise awareness about land mines sponsored by Poetic Republic. Well, I didn't win that one either. The same poet as the year before won again.

Contest #3 was also a poetry contest, called Best New Poets, and is highly competitive. I didn't have a chance, but it was fun anyway.


Contest #4 was another contest sponsored by Helium, in which the articles compete to be purchased by some magazine looking for articles about "Garden Gifts for Dad this Father's Day".  I didn't win, but I wasn't last.  

Contest #5 was simply a poem submitted for publication to ISREADS, a literary magazine that publishes their stuff outside - like on light posts or supermarket carts. I thought it was a cool idea.  This is the only contest to which I do not have my response. I have followed up with them, but to no avail, and they have not published another issue yet... so I await.

Contest #6 is one I made up to compete with myself to see if I could double the maximum number of hits to this blog in one day. I didn't win. Although I did get a maximum number of hits in one day, I didn't double my previous record. It made for one of my favorite blog posts. I did this post as part of Blog Action Day, which in itself was fun to participate in as well.

* * * 

New Contest #7 Summary: Best of what's around.

I entered contest #7 on Friday, and by far the most fun I have had during this adventure! It was on a site called Words Undone, which is a small online writing group which I am quite liking. You have to be a member to view the forums, which is good because then submitted work is simply critiqued, rather than published (like it is on Helium).

The contest is something they call "Friday Flash" and it goes something like this: There is a prompt. You have 24 hours (but I figure you should do it as quick as you can, I took about an hour). Then members vote for their favorite and give feedback on all the pieces submitted. There were 8 submissions and 10 people voted.

"The following prompts can be combined or used individually as required
 
Suggested words: Burn, Trees, Lips, White
Or use one of the following titles: Power Supply, My Favourite Place
Or include any of the following phrases: The cupboard was bare, Wish I’d thought of that, I found this lying around

Maximum of 500 words
Submissions to be posted by midnight Friday. Once all submissions are in, the thread is open for comments and voting. Winners are proposed to Lorraine for inclusion in the next WU Magazine."

I got 1 vote (Yay! the winner got 3), and some great feedback! Here is my non-winning entry, although I revised it only slightly according to the feedback given (specifically, the beard was "golden", as in the King Tut mask in my head, but someone thought I meant a blonde man and got confused).

* * *  

[out to lunch]

* * *

Ego Summary: Be here Now.

Have to say that traffic to this site has increased. I have profited from the awareness about Egypt, it's place in this exciting region, and the fact that I have the good luck to be here now. I'll take it. Thanks to everyone sharing my link on Facebook and thanks to the Beaufort Gazette for a little more publicity (featured hometown girl blog).

I have some ideas for upcoming posts: more on Egypt, Cairo, and life here, but also some rants on data, dorks, and dumbassery (stolen word).

Final report

Alright then. Fine. Contest #6 was invented by me, therefore the results come quickly.

The short answer: I lost.
After a project is implemented, a final report is written. That will be the long answer.

Total contest tally: 0/5, awaiting the results of submission #5.

* * *

Final Report

Project Title:  Emergency support to vulnerable egos affected by the writing contest drought

Trayle, 17 October 2010

Overall Purpose: To contribute to my own happiness by having some fun writing

Achievements: Significant improvements in happiness and fun are evident within the target population. Ongoing, qualitative and quantitative monitoring and evaluation exercises continue to demonstrate an improved level of autonomy, ego-satisfaction and humor. The style of the blog in question has improved and focused, comments are increasing and the audience is becoming wider. The Technorati Authority of this blog has increased from 1 to 110, although the Google rating remains at 0. This shows minor improvements, but is also evidence that long term investment is needed to have an impact upon the overall purpose.

Specific Objective: To "win" at least one of these damn "contests"

Achievements: Although the specific objective for the current project was not yet achieved (see discussion on indicators), it is part of a wider, integrated approach of 10 coordinated efforts from various sources. The 15th of October 2010 indeed had the highest number of visitors in the history of the blog (59 total).

Objectively Verifiable Indicator: The number of visits to this blog on Blog Action Day (October 15, 2010) will be twice the maximum number of visits on any other day (baseline value: 45 visits).

Means of Verification: Google Analytics

Achievements: Google Analytics showed 59 visits during the project implementation period, an improvement of 31% from the baseline, and the highest number of visitors ever in one day. It is hypothesized that seasonal effects impacted baseline value of the indicator (see graph for long term seasonal variations). It should be noted that the baseline measurement was made on 7th of September, after two significant changes in status of the direct beneficiary population (moved to Haiti and got a new domain name) and thus the baseline value is artificially high (high interest season, new domain testing hits). Long term averages show about 9 visits per day, and thus 59 visits in one day is an excellent improvement (555% above the long term average).

The Tao of Water

I am an amateur blogger. 
I am a professional humanitarian aid worker in the water sector.
I am thus obliged to participate in this here incredible extravaganza called “Blog Action Day 2010 Water.” 

But don’t think I do so begrudgingly.  To save the world, you have to focus and today that focus fits me pretty well.

* * *

Water is simple: three atoms, two elements, one small molecule.

Add another molecule and those tricky little hydrogen bonds start complicating things. Water doesn’t behave the way it should. Water is subversive. Little rascal. And that is precisely what makes it important.

Add solutes, energy, people and the rest of the world and water gets complicated. Very complicated. Very quickly. And very important.

* * *

A link poem
(But don’t let the links distract you just yet…)

Water is or is not
accessible, distributed, shared,
contaminated, cleaned, protected,
managed, exploited, recycled,
used.

Water creates or controls
diarrhea, malaria, malnutrition, 
HIV, health, bodies,
food, animals, products, energy,
productivity, livelihoods, economics,
life.

Water detains or develops
women’s choices, education, social structures,
religion, land issues, conflicts, wars,
politics, corruption, human rights,
history.

Water is oceans, tsunamis, floods and droughts, climate change.

Water is simply
part of a complex
violent, calm, deplorable, luxurious
system of which we are
a small part.

 
*  *  *

Words on a blog are linear. Water is not linear.

If you spread out all those words in a circle on the floor, take colored string or paint or sand, and started connecting each idea to all those others with which it has a relationship, you would end up with incredible art, perhaps a mandala, about water. One day I will do this.

* * *

Today, I will let others take you on the journey through those ideas. Although I am qualified, I will let others explain and expand on that simple list of words. I will let others cite numbers and statistics.

Get out of your pool (so you don't ruin the computer), sit in the shade (so you can see the screen) and follow links and learn about water and the world in which we live.

Trust me, water shapes your world and a world bigger than yours. Those iron-sheeting shacks, those mud-pressed-in-sticks huts, those billion slum/desert/jungle dwelling worlds aren’t so far from yours.

(But please, please, I beg you… remember two things: Hiesenberg and Bias).

* * *

Today, my contribution will be an introduction to the Tao of Water.

You have probably heard of the Tao Te Chieng. It is a series of 81 chapters of (sometimes cryptic, always relevant) Chinese wisdom compiled around 500 B.C. in which water is a reoccurring theme (my bias).

In chapters 8, 15, 32, 36, 39, 43, 61, 66 and 78, water or its properties are mentioned.

8:
Higher good is like water: the good in water benefits all, and does so without contention. It rests where people dislike to be, so it is close to the Way.
Where it dwells becomes good ground;

15:
…their relaxation was as that of ice at the melting point. Simple as uncarved wood, open as valleys, they were inscrutable as murky water.
Who can, in turbidity,
use the gradual clarification of stillness?

32:

Heaven and earth combine, thus showering sweet dew. No humans command it; it is even by nature.
The Way is to the world as rivers and oceans to valley streams.

36:
This is called subtle illumination. Flexible and yielding overcome adamant coerciveness.

39:
When unity was attained of old, heaven became clear by attaining unity
valley streams were filled by attaining unity…
What brought this about was unity:
without means of clarity, heaven may burst; without means of steadiness, earth may erupt; without means of quickening, spirit may be exhausted; without means of filling,
valley streams may dry up,

43:
What is softest in the world drives what is hardest in the world.

61:
A great nation flows downward into intercourse with the world.

66:
The reason why rivers and seas can be lords of the hundred valleys is that they lower themselves to them all;

78:
Nothing in the world is more flexible and yielding than water. Yet when it attacks the firm and the strong, none can withstand it, because they have no way to change it.

(Translations used without permission, although I have indeed purchased the book from which they came and recommend it as a nice translation. From THE ESSENTIAL TAO - Translated and presented by Thomas Cleary)

* * *

Words to live by. Literally.

I hope you enjoy Blog Action Day about water. I hope you let the links destract you.

I hope you stick around and check out my adventures and adventrues.

I hope you leave a comment. Do you have a link that might fit in my poem? Did I miss a water reference in the Tao?

* * *

End note 1

In doing what I do, I work in a broader field than just water. We have a nifty acronym: WASH. This stands for water, sanitation and hygiene (though I try as much as I can to get even boarder than that). As a wild WASH woman, it is my duty to also share with you some related news about today, October 15, 2010:

Today is also Global Handwashing Day.

Handwashing is important. It the most cost effective way to prevent diarrhea (Lancet). More so than clean water. Admittably, water helps in washing hands… (although when you are in the dessert, rubbing your hands with dirt and sand can also clean them), but don’t get me started on handwashing, just check out some of the interesting stuff online. (Just remember Hiesenberg and bias as you read.)

* * *

End note 2

“I am an expert.”  (hits television…)

I have asked you readers to trust my qualifications, to trust that I know what I am talking about, to trust I have some authority to blog about water and that maybe my links here are “good” ones. In fact, I do.
I don’t mean to sound egotisitical (although sometimes I play that game here in blog-land), and in fact I am quite humble and insecure.

“…and thorough.”

My point is not my personality, but rather if you don’t trust me (and why should you?), drop a comment and I’ll send you my CV (especially if you want to hire me).

And if three people do it...

There is a fun treat at the end, after the business.

* * *

So, the contests continue, although I seem to be cheating a lot. But I make the rules, and no one seems to be objecting. (Uh, maybe that's cause no one is reading.) It's gone from contests to competitions, to submissions... to this. In my defense, the process has been transparent, I am not trying to manipulate the data, just have some fun.

To the right you will see a little widget for Blog Action Day. I normally won't put any advertising or such on my blog, but this is to fully participate in the endevour. You can read about the event or sign their petition to save the world.

Contest #6:  In terms of my contest rules, this is not a contest. So I will make it a contest with myself.

I previously discussed indicators. In aid work, these indicators demonstrate that you have achieved your objectives at/to various levels - in other words, show if you have "won" or not.
In my line of work, indicators must be SMART:
- S - Specific
- M - Measurable
- A - Achievable
- R - Relevant
- T - Time-bound
(Not as easy as you think.)

So in order for this to be a real contest with myself I have devised a contest FRAMEWORK, which includes a smart INDICATOR to measure the success of my OBJECTIVE. (Which is how it works in my world, but I won't give you a lessson of aid project frameworks today. For those of you in my line of work enjoy the following...)

* * *

Project Title:  Emergency support to vulnerable egos affected by the writing contest drought

Overall Purpose: To contribute to my own happiness by having some fun writing

Specific Objective: To "win" at least one of these damn "contests"

Objectively Verifiable Indicator: The number of visits to this blog on Blog Action Day (October 15, 2010) will be twice the maximum number of visits on any other day (baseline value: 45 visits).

Means of Verification: Google Analytics

* * *

There you have it. Spread the word. I will make a lot of noise to remind you on the 15th.
I promise I'll make it "good" - though what's good for me, may not be good for you...

* * *

"You know, if one person, just one person does it
they may think he's really sick and they won't take him. 
And if two people, two people do it,
in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it,
three, can you imagine,
three people walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out.
They may think it's an organization. 
And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day,
I said fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. 
And friends they may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is, the Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and all you got to do to join is sing it the next time it come's around on the guitar.

With feeling. 

So we'll wait for it to come around on the guitar, here and sing it when it does.  Here it comes."

-The younger Guthrie man

Follow down

I felt I needed to follow up on a few things. So in all ernestness, I try to satisfy that subversive dark side and hence I will follow down.

* * *

Writing adventure:

With all my ranting about numbers, you'd've thunk I'd get them right myself, or at least use some consistant reporting format. Last time I mentioned my progress, well I screwed it all up. So, in fact I am 0/4, awaiting results on 1 submission. Some time back I wrote 4/5, which doesn't even make sense. (Even less than the double contraction in the phrase "you'd've thunk.")

To those of you who are new, that means I have entered 5 writing contests or competitions of somesort, I have not won any of them and I am awaiting the results of 1.

The sixth event is in view. It is not a contest at all I don't think, so maybe I won't count it in the tally, but it is a writing event in which I will participate. Stay tuned for mid-October. (Thanks for the tip, Sophie.)

Not very good results, but half way through my adventure, I think it is really hard to win these things. Who knows what "they" are looking for. Who knows who I am competing against. But I do know one thing, I am having fun and it is making me write more.

As for my ego, it is happily enjoying trying to make my blog better.

* * *

Life adventure:

Maybe the events of the past few weeks is why I feel the need to follow down, rather than up. Earthquake. Floods. Mouse in the office.

There was no major damage from the earthquake (a few things fell down that were already falling, I thought that someone was kicking my bed). More significant was the way it made people feel.

Summary Data: Magnitude 4.4, 3 minutes to verify it by a USGS siesmologist, 3 more minutes to get my own GPS point from my phone, download the KML file from USGS, plot the points in GoogleEarth and make the following map. 19.2 miles from me (as the crow flies). I love it. How cool is that!

The bias is clear. How me-centered is all that data? Hiesenberg... not sure how he fits in, but he must. By making the map did I affect anything? I spent a few minutes with the gaurds showing them the map. They may have thought I was nuts, but they seemed to enjoy the company.

And then the floods and winds came down from heaven with great wrath, and many of the 8 (9?) month old ramshackle tents and tarps got blown to shit. Billboards flew around among the power lines. People died. And how did it affect me? The office went into overdrive. Very exciting and good learning from some talented folks.

But the mouse in the office was the real emergency, and like all big storms, he got a name. Murphy the WASH Cluster mascot mouse.

Oh boy do I sound... jaded? tired? twisted? I assure you, I am all of those things.

* * *

For you folks at home, I do not live in a tent anymore. When I am not in Port au Prince, I live in a 2x3m room in a metal shipping container. Quite safe in an earthquake and in a storm. When I am in Port au Prince, I live on my friends' floors. Still a hobo singin' that lullaby.

Shifting stances

I'll try to keep it short, but the stream is moving and I am going with it.

* * * 

Business first.

So on the contest front, I was 3/5, awaiting the results of two contests. Now I am 4/5, awaiting 1.
Contest #3 results are in and, as I predicted, I didn't win. This does not break my heart because this was a high level competition. Students in professional writing programs are nominated. You can't see the poems on the site yet, but I am sure one or two of the poems will blow my (your) mind.

During my off-time I have gotten to see so many old friends, and with some I have had the pleasure of chatting about this adventure in writing contests or writing in general. I am blessed to be friends with poets, editors, dreamers like me and my mom. I was hesitant in all this. Professionals confirm it is hella competitive. Friends are honest.  Moms are always encouraging.

I said: I don't want to say my goal is to write a book, because - what if I don't or I can't?
Friend: But by saying it, you might be more motivated. And your friends will care and encourage you.
Mom: And if you don't that's okay too, just do what god makes/lets/encourages you to do. 

That's pretty paraphrased, but I kind of agree with all of that.

* * * 

Breathe out.
I am headed out.
New country.
New adventure. New organisation. New role.
Same me.
How will it all combine and entwine and rewind?
To become my life?

* * *

More to come about the past two weeks which have indeed been learning for me in a small van, with fog, with sunshine, with micro climates and with...

2 to 2

Contest #2) So, not really any news cause I didn't win the contest, but they finally put up the poems for the public to see, so I thought I would provide a link here so you can check it out. None of the judges put any comments, which I was bummed about, but that is okay. This poem I had shared with a friend and my mom, neither loved it.


To A Poet Laureate

Dear Sam,
I once wrote eight page
letters to your son, quickly
placed inside the cedar shake box
punctuating
your driveway lined with alder saplings.
I pumped my bike up one, two, three
straight hills to Sawmill Corner
hoping you and Sally
never knew that it was me.

A round faced nine, ten, eleven
year old, I once bound blank
diaries during art, which you
the printer, must have taught.
Boring holes through stacked sheets with
needles, the blunt end cut my finger
making it hard to tie thin thread.
Somehow three small bundles became a single
tome, glue beaten with a wide stubby brush
into paper we must have made
from fresh pulp.

Inside, I once wrote eight line
poems, invented words in colored
pen, punctuation
revised with wild insects flying round
kerosene lamps, flashlights and blue
computer screens.
I completed only one, quickly
placed inside the cedar shake box
hoping you and Sally
might think that it was me.

Back to backsides

And so the tally stands as is. 0/3, waiting on 1/1 and not so optimistic (I aimed a little high).

Contest #5) Is not a contest, but is competitive. The goal in this is to motivate me to just see what's out there, not winning, but exploring. So cause I found something I thought was a pretty interesting idea, I thought I'd include it. Cause I can. I submitted a poem to "IsReads" an outdoor journal: "The concept of the outdoor journal is to put short poems in unusual places, like on abandoned buildings and in shopping carts."

Regarding contest #1) Helium. I find it depressing and poor today. The one reason I liked it at first was that it seemed open and democratic, but I found that to be its weakness. The content of some articles against which mine compete are just wrong. Maybe it's me not being open enough. Who knows. I will continue until I have made 25 dollars. Fine. Currently still have the two stars, which is good, but my poems fell to having only a bronze medal from silver.

* * *

And my vacation will continue.

4 for the score

 Contest #4) I may be cheating on this one, but I think it is okay. On Helium they have what they call a "Marketplace" where publishers post articles titles they want written to. Then in theory, the publisher will choose one of the articles to publish - and they pay you money - 32 big ones riding on this one. Nice. Also, I think the turnaround time is quite quick, so my poor ego will quickly be either slightly hurt or 32 bucks richer. This is not a contest, per se, but it is a competition - so I'm letting the rules slide.

The really moving article title is "Garden gifts for Dad this Father's Day." How mundane is that? But this is part of the challenge. I have no authority here. My dad neither gardens, nor gives a hoot about gifts. He is way too cool for that. Let us continue.

One must be able to write about anything. I remember in college, one of the senior members of the lit mag staff said: "If you can write a poem about a cup of tea, you can be a poet." I did write that poem; it probably sucked and who knows where it is now... I may have to try again.

Do check out my Helium article on "Recipes: Great ways to cook muskrats."

 * * *

In more exciting news... On my drive "up-country" from Nairobi, I saw an ELEPHANT! In the wild, my friend, au natural. Moving so slow as we zoomed by, it moved me a little. Just hanging out by the side of the road. I got a photo of its butt, which I will post (in all it's anti-climatic glory) but the internet is by cell modem for the next week, so I am slightly handicapped. I saw baboons too, but they aren't quite as magical as an elephant. 

There was also a boat in a tree and roofs without walls...

I am also working on my manifesto. Mario, my husband, and I are involved in a friendly manifesto competition (we are truely made for each other)... but I won't count that as one of the contests.

Adventrue Numba 3

I broke the promise consciously,
left it without regard.
I promised pictures and rancorously
left my honor marred.
Can I make up for my mistake
with this stupid rhyme?
My life is dull, I could not take
an adventrue in this time.

* * *

Well the Helium experiment (from Contest #1) continues. I have learned that the first essay I wrote will never be removed from that site, and I will never be able to improve it! Damn, says my ego. Good for ya, says myself.

Still, the experiment continues. I have submitted a few more essays, just for practice. I have earned the first form of Helium-based validation - a "writing star" which means that I have reached some quantity goal while maintaining some quality of standard based on how the masses view my articles (poems don't count).

I have learned that when I write about stuff I do not really care about or about subjects in which I am not an expert, the ranking of my articles is much better. I am trained as a hydrogeologist and I am a weird and not-too-girly woman, but my articles about aquifers and water are apparently shit and my best ranked articles are about how to cook and put on makeup.

I suppose I must admit, in public, that I do love to cook (my stress relief) and I find getting all kinda nice-looking fun. I guess I am a little girly.

I also must somehow question, not the quality of the Helium site or the writing there, but it's purpose. I guess it is not meant for public enlightenment on scientific issues and that this is not the venue to achieve the goal of trying to convince stupid people that climate change exists. Which, you may observe, is leaving me somehow frustrated because there are so many crappy articles there arguing that climate change and global warming are myths. There are articles that are supposed to talk about aquifers, but go on and on about the "groundwaters" with heaps of wrong information. Arf.

I seem to have started that paragraph sensibly enough, but it degenerated into a rant. Drama can be good. But really it just proves what I said before, is that I guess popular writing is figuring out what your audience wants.

I feel some subversive energy coming on here.
I want to use bad english to explain the glory of science and all its uncertainties!
I want to use incomplete sentences to subtly insult creationists!
I embrace bad spelling because sometimes it makes life an adventrue!
Is that so wrong?

(Source: Adventrue is a brilliant slip that I have stolen from my mother.)

* * *

So Contest #2 is closed and I am now participating in the cyber democratic voting process. So far I have had to read 12 poems, in which I ranked my top 4. There were some good ones - as well as some true crap, which one will undoubtedly find where ever one endeavors to read anything remotely poetic. I think the winners are announced sometime in July. I will keep you posted on how the competition stacks up in the continued rounds of judging... I might not be so quick to use the word "crap" next time.

* * *

Contest #3) So, in all transparency I must disclose that between now and 20 May 2010 I will enter another contest. This one is also for poetry. It is different than the last in that it is judged by professional poets at a literary magazine. While a supporter of the cyber-democracy voting process of which I have been a part in the first two contests, it is my duty to choose contests with varied challenges.

As this is a pretty high level contest, I doubt I will have any chance and feel a bit foolish and freaked out. That said, my ego thinks it would be damn cool to get a nod from a professional, even if I don't win. I mean, I got to go all out and day dream.

So, on this one I enlisted a friend and a mom (my own mom) to rank some of my poems to help me choose which ones to enter. They also gave me some useful feedback on how to make them better. I was surprised to find they both had the same favorite, and it was not my favorite. I liked the one that was more personal to me I guess. I trust them on their judgment of the best.

After the contest, I will tell you which contest it was (with a link to the winners etc.) and I will also post the poems that I entered. I am not sure on rules, but it may be better to leave them off the blog until it is over. Same with the last contest. Frankly, I am not at all clear on what means the word "published," as to me a blog ain't exactly respectable literature. But who knows, the words are out there.

* * *

Fine. I give in. Here is a photo or two. My consciousness is not, in fact, rancorous.
But be aware, I am forced to recycle a bit for lack of adventrue.

This is me between 2 big ass tanks on some rocks in Garbatulla. Just doing my job. I was just looking, we didn't build these, the ministry did.

This is just a strange image that I like.

These are my new glasses. That may be as close to my recent medical adventrues as you will get without me totally grossing you out. But that would've been more fun wouldnt it?

21 cents and a poetry contest

So recently I may have said that I was "puttin' myself out there" and that I would enter 10 writing contests. Despite tanking on my first try, I will carry on. I will... (Ah I wanted to quote "Californication," but it’s definitely not appropriate, so I will simply...) continue.

I am having a great time at this. I have learned you need write to the right audience and I may be a better poet than esseyist.

Contest #1 (the tanker) was through a site called Helium, where you set up a profile (check me out, click on "articles" tab to see the writing) and you submit articles. Your articles are then rated by the other members against the others anonymously, double blind. Part of my duty as a member is also to fairly rank others against each other. Democracy. There is apparently like 400,000 members or some such mad number. So everything you submit is ranked by "the masses."

My conclusion about poetry is related to the rankings of my poems on this site. So far, I have submitted 4 essays and 4 poems. My essays are ranked at 48% and poems at 95%. Go figure. I didn't find my essays THAT bad! A little boring, maybe, but more factual than some of the competition... to be continued. You haven't seen the last of my science-geek-essay-writing-ass!

The other semi-interesting thing on this site is that they share their advertising proceeds with members (to be a member is free). I have, so far, made 21 cents. Does that make me a professional?

Contest #2) I have entered a poetry contest (MAG Poetry Compitition 2010 on PoetRepublic.com) which costs 6 pounds sterling and benefits MAG, a de-mining organization, which is a worthy cause which I believe in, especially having lived in Afghanistan. The poem must be unpublished and less than 42 lines long. It doesn’t have to have anything to do with Afghanistan or mines. Since it is a contest, I can not put the poem here on my blog until it the contest is done. The winners are announced in July. The judges are the contestants in another web-domocratic-double-blind-manner. So I am a judge. Wish me luck on my poem.

On anther interesting side note, this writing adventure has brought me a little closer to a friend, of course re-discovered through facebook, but who is sorta like me in exploring writing and who is very cool.

And to bring it full circle, her sister just started blog about bees, which is pretty funny. Why would you need 14,000 bees? But you just might.

* * *

I went to Oslo, where I went to the ICE BAR. eh. over rated. over priced. Cool to be in a freezer, but not worth 30 bucks.

* * *

I also went to Garbatulla again, which was very nice now that we have something to do!

Relentless. 

This photo shows

Drought, 

Flood, Drought

upon cornstalks.

Kenya is beautiful. From a distance.

Somehow I kept looking like a fat pirate.

Puttin' myself out there...

I want to ask you a favor in a small adventure to either satisfy or break my ego. Read on.

So, I like to write. I like words. In the past I dabbled in literary magazines and participated in a fairly prestigeous writing camp. Not really been published, but sort of. I have this darn blog that not so many people read. Sometimes people find it entertaining and sometimes boring. So, I asked myself, if I want to write and say something... how do I know if I really can? Am I good enough? How can I get better? Does anyone want to read what I write?  Why? Why not? What do I have to say anyway?

Basically, this is my ego talking (yes, we all have one). So I thought I would look online for some adventures in writing. Can I validate myself? What's my direction? Is there some niche for my quirky style? Or should I continue to be satisfied writing for fun?

I am going to enter 10 online writing contests and see what happens... I will try to find a variety of them, but so far I am not an expert and there is a lot out there! (oh and by the way, no deadline... eh. I do have a job.)
As I do so, I will post them here and I will include the outcome.
I would love to hear what you think too! 
Tell me where you got bored, where you stopped reading.
Don't tell me what you liked.
Tell me what sucked.

Contest # 1)  I entered an essay writing contest for World Water Day. The audience wasn't totally clear, but to be less than 750 words. The results are announced the 9th, but I won't win, gosh darn it. Today (9 April) it is ranked 38 out of 105 submissions - and you have to be in the top 10 to be considered. Not exactly validation, I am afraid to say. But Fuck it, right? You gotta just put you self out there and let your ego take a thrashing.
So here is my entry, in all its sentimental glory.

(the title was given by the contest makers)

Inadequate access to safe water and sanitation claims 4,500 lives a day. What should we do about it?

Quick update: I changed the above to a link, as appearently this is better netiquette. 

The article has currently fallen to 87/103 (14 April)! I have gotten some great feedback, though and I will be updating the article once I am allowed by the site (when contest winner is announced). Stay tuned as my ego bashing continues. (Waaahaa haaa evil laugh)